GenParenting

Parenting resources for all who love and care for children

Parenting

Teens

You Raise Your Children to Leave

You Raise Your Children to Leave

The very best parenting advice I have ever received was simply the statement, “You raise them to leave.” As an educator I am intimately aware of the concept of beginning with the end in mind, but it seems that far too often as parents we forget exactly what that end may be. I know that in the midst of trying to parent four children that I often need to take a step back and think about this simple statement before I respond because this is NOT my natural default mechanism when dealing with my own children.

The beauty and power of this statement is that no two people reading this need to have that same end in mind. Getting your children ready to leave may look much different in your mind’s eye than it does in mine. This is where the strength of the concept comes from. This simply forces us to consider what it is that we want for our kids when we are making our parenting decisions.

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Parent’s Guide to School Communication from an Educator

Parent’s Guide to School Communication from an Educator

I have found that often times parents of all backgrounds and educational levels have difficulty in understanding how they should communicate with schools regarding their children. So, I have put together some quick guidelines that I think will improve the school – parent partnership. To be clear, I believe that in the IDEAL circumstances it is the responsibility of the school to take the lead on this. That said, I think this can be beneficial for everyone involved.

Establish Communication Protocols and Expectations

As a parent it is important to understand that your child’s teacher likely has between 20 and 150 other students that they are working with every day. That said, it is fair to expect that you receive communication from the school if and when they notice any change in behavior, mood, or performance. As a parent, I believe that this is a fair expectation to share with your child’s educators and also a responsibility to share the same communication under the same parameters with the school as a courtesy if you noticing something at home. [Read more…]

Let’s Be Honest: Teen Sexting

Let’s Be Honest: Teen Sexting

Let’s talk about sex(ting), baby . . .

If you are around my age (early 40s) like many parents who are reading blogs like this are, that introductory sentence immediately brings you back to a time when hearing “that” song on the radio or on MTV felt salacious. Well, I think we all know that is nothing compared to what is at our kids’ fingertips at all times right now. [Read more…]

The Balancing Act of Afterschool Activities 

The Balancing Act of Afterschool Activities

It is cold outside and we struggle with balancing our daily lives. How can we keep our kids active in their daily lives even in the dead of winter? Most of our kids are over scheduled with sports, homework, afterschool activities, and screen time. Other children come home to empty homes and waste away hours waiting for parents to come home from work while eating snacks and watching television or playing video games. And other children have overwhelming household responsibilities to help their family with sibling care, dinner preparation, and laundry chores. [Read more…]

Being a Mom and Homeschool Teacher

Being a Mom and Homeschool Teacher

One of the beautiful benefits of homeschooling is how well I know my “students” before the school year even begins. I know their interests and aversions, their academic strengths and gaps, and their personality traits and quirks. I can adapt the curriculum and our days accordingly. I often know before the school day begins if they got a good night’s sleep, argued with a family member that morning, felt a little under the weather the night before, or have recently experienced the emotional loss of a family member. I also can anticipate that they might have trouble concentrating if something exciting is approaching, like a family road trip or a friend’s birthday extravaganza.

Understanding Our Children’s Learning Needs

Because I wear the hats of both mom and teacher, I have this information ahead of time. I can adapt the lesson, be an empathetic listener, take the time to teach them coping skills and process what is happening. As I homeschool my own children, I am grateful that I have the knowledge and flexibility to help them through the ups and downs of childhood and adolescence during the school day.

Being Objective as the Teacher

However, there is a flip side to doing life and school together with my children. Sometimes, the lines between school and home get blurred. Most of the time, we are traveling through life experiences together. If my child is hurting, struggling, or grieving, I often am experiencing those emotions as well.

Balancing Mom Responsibilities with Teaching

As a classroom teacher, it was easier for me to compartmentalize my life inside and outside of school and not bring my personal worries and distractions into the classroom. As the mom and teacher, it takes a concentrated effort during hard or stressful seasons of life to not let my personal life seep into our school day. Children are so intuitive. They can sense and often reflect the emotional state that we project. I can get sidetracked by the growing pile of laundry, the upsetting doctor’s call that came right before the school day, or the worries that interrupted my sleep the night before. If I do not set these distractions aside to focus on our school day, those emotions will transfer to my kids, interrupting their education.

Blending Home and School Needs

It takes intention to know when to blend home and school, when to process life together during the day, and when to set it aside until later. The close proximity of school and home can be a blessing and a burden. Recognizing this duality is the easy part. Finding a healthy balance takes awareness and commitment.