Wow! My College Son Grew Up!
It has been several months since my son left home and went off to college. It is only winter break! But, to me, my son now looks like a man or a grown-up college guy.
A Campus Visit
When visiting EJ at school we were without a car. We used public transportation to tour San Francisco and the surrounding Bay Area. San Francisco has become his city and my son now acts as my tour guide when showing me around.
EJ is majoring in math and physical sciences with an emphasis in biology. He is enrolled in 15 semester units of college courses. The course work is challenging. He decided to take calculus with a pass or no pass grade. He loves all of his classes. The university setting provides my son the space to grow and be challenged. EJ likes the book stacks at the library and secludes himself there when studying for exams.
My son also has a campus job. He drives a golf cart during the football games and safely transports elderly fans back to their cars. When I hear him speak, I am aware that my son is becoming other centered through his service to people with needs.
EJ likes his bilingual roommate. Initially, my son was concerned because he had not heard his native Spanish language during the orientation visit. He had chosen not to live in the Latino or African American dorm floors because he wanted to meet his campus acquaintances organically.
EJ is choosing to eat a vegetarian diet on campus. Initially I panicked and sent care packages to ensure that he had enough food. I soon learned that EJ could take a to go box from the dining commons for between meal snacks. Our son has created a village of support at the black student union and another with his summer college orientation group. He regularly visits one of his best friends at a nearby college campus.
Coming Home for the Holidays
When EJ came home for the holiday break, he was happy to be in his own bed and connect with his old friends. Although he had assignments to complete during the holiday break, we were able to find time to attend a local football game which his college team lost by one goal.
I think when you raise your children to take risks and to live apart from you, you provide them with the necessary self-sufficiency skills to be successful in a college environment that challenges their resilience.
Cherish and trust your capable college student with your new, long distance relationship!
Copyright (c) 2018 by GenParenting
Yvette King-Berg, is the Executive Director of Youth Policy Institute’s Charter Schools. She was the former California Charter Schools Association Vice-President of School Development and Outreach-Southern California. Ms. King-Berg has over thirty years of experience working with teachers, students, parents, and organizations in a variety of positions including Director, Assistant Director, Curriculum Advisor, Bilingual, and Title 1 Coordinators, classroom teacher (K-12) in Pasadena and LAUSD. She has been married for twenty-three years, and is the proud mother of her son, EJ, who attends UC Berkeley.