Help for Struggling Students

As a K–3 special education teacher, I’ve learned that some of our students struggle loudly—and some struggle quietly. And sometimes, they struggle in that in-between space: big enough behaviors that everyone notices… but not yet formally supported by a Tier 2 or Tier 3 plan.

If you’re a parent or teacher seeing behaviors that clearly need more than just reminders and redirection—but there’s no formal intervention plan in place yet—this post is for you.

Some behaviors don’t quite fit into “typical classroom challenges,” but they also don’t yet have a formal Tier 2 or Tier 3 plan attached to them. As parents and teachers, that in-between space can feel frustrating and uncertain. We know a child needs more support—but we’re still waiting on meetings, data, or next steps. The good news? We don’t have to wait for paperwork to begin helping. There are practical, proactive strategies we can start right away to support students who need more structure, regulation, and skill-building.

First, Let’s Ground Ourselves in MTSS

In a Multi-Tiered System of Supports (MTSS), Tier 1 is what all students receive: clear expectations, consistent routines, and positive reinforcement. Tier 2 provides targeted, small-group or structured supports. Tier 3 is individualized and intensive. But here’s the reality: sometimes there’s a lag between recognizing a need and having a formal Tier 2 or Tier 3 plan written and implemented. During that gap, kids still need support. And we can give it.

Step 1: Shift from “Why are they doing this?” to “What is this behavior communicating?”

Behavior is communication. A child who refuses work may be saying:

“This feels too hard.”

“I don’t know how to start.”

“I’m overwhelmed.”

A child who disrupts may be saying:

“I need attention.”

“I need movement.”

“I feel out of control.”

Instead of reacting to the surface behavior, we respond to the unmet need underneath it.

Step 2: Increase Structure Immediately.

Students who likely need Tier 2 or 3 supports almost always benefit from more structure—not more consequences.

Try:

Visual schedules (even simple sticky note checklists)
First/Then language (“First math, then drawing.”)
Clear start and finish markers
Breaking work into smaller chunks
Timers for both work and breaks

Structure lowers anxiety. Lower anxiety lowers behavior.

Step 3: Pre-Teach Expectations.

Many of our students who struggle behaviorally don’t lack motivation—they lack clarity. Before a known trigger (recess, transitions, group work), preview expectations:

“When we line up, our hands stay by our sides.”

“During centers, we use quiet voices.”

“If you feel frustrated, you can raise your hand or use your break card.”

Role-play it. Practice it. Reinforce it immediately when you see it.

Step 4: Increase Positive Feedback (More Than Feels Natural).

If a student is likely headed toward Tier 2 or 3, they are often hearing more corrections than praise.

Flip the ratio.

Catch:

The 30 seconds they stayed in their seat.
The one safe choice they made.
The moment they tried again.

Specific praise builds replacement behaviors:

“I noticed you started even though it felt hard.”

“You kept your hands safe.”

“You asked for help instead of shutting down.”

We grow what we notice.

Step 5: Offer Regulated Breaks Before Escalation

If you wait until the meltdown, you’re too late. Build proactive regulation:

Scheduled movement breaks
Sensory tools
Calm-down corners
Short “jobs” that reset the nervous system

At home, this might look like:

Heavy work (carrying laundry, pushing a vacuum)
Outside time
A quiet reset space
Regulation first. Instruction second.

Step 6: Start Simple Data Collection

Even without a formal plan, start noticing patterns:

When does it happen?
What happens right before?
What happens right after?

You don’t need fancy charts. Sticky notes work. This information helps teams move toward Tier 2 or Tier 3 supports faster—and more effectively.

For Parents: You’re Not “Behind.”

If your child doesn’t yet have a formal behavior plan but clearly needs more support, you are not failing. Schools move through processes. Sometimes they move slowly. Ask:

“What Tier 2 supports can we try?”

“Can we start Check-In/Check-Out?”

“Can we monitor behavior for a few weeks?”

Advocacy doesn’t have to be confrontational. It can be collaborative. Some behaviors don’t quite fit into “typical classroom challenges,” but they also don’t yet have a formal Tier 2 or Tier 3 plan attached to them. As parents and teachers, that in-between space can feel frustrating and uncertain. We know a child needs more support—but we’re still waiting on meetings, data, or next steps. The good news? We don’t have to wait for paperwork to begin helping. There are practical, proactive strategies we can start right away to support students who need more structure, regulation, and skill-building.

Helping English Learners Succeed

When a child walks into school brand new to English, they are doing something incredibly brave. They’re learning new routines, new friendships, new expectations and a whole new language at the same time. That’s a lot for anyone. The good news? With the right support at home and at school, multilingual kids can absolutely thrive.

First, let’s start here: being multilingual is a gift. Research shared by Colorín Colorado and the National Association for the Education of Young Children shows that speaking more than one language strengthens thinking skills, problem-solving, and flexibility. So instead of seeing English as something a child is “behind” in, it helps to see all the language they already have as a huge strength.

Keep the Home Language Strong

Parents, keep speaking your strongest language at home. Tell stories. Ask questions. Laugh. Read together. A strong foundation in a child’s first language actually helps them learn English faster. You are not “confusing” them—you are building their brain.

Teachers, use their name correctly. Invite families to share traditions or favorite books. Even small efforts show children that who they are matters.

Make Things Visual and Clear

When kids are learning English, they understand more when they can see what’s happening. Pictures, gestures, modeling, and clear examples make a big difference.

At school, that might mean showing what to do instead of only explaining it. At home, it might look like previewing new topics. If your child is learning about weather, talk about rain, snow, or sunshine in your home language first. When they hear those ideas again in English, they’ll connect the dots more easily.

Be Patient with Talking

Many children go through a “silent period” when learning a new language. They may listen carefully but say very little. That’s normal. They are absorbing everything.

Instead of pushing them to speak before they’re ready, focus on helping them feel safe. Smile. Offer encouragement. Celebrate effort. Confidence grows when children feel accepted, not corrected at every turn. Social language comes more easily than academic language. It all takes time.

Support “School Words”

Kids often learn playground English faster than classroom English. They might chat easily with friends but struggle with words like “compare,” “predict,” or “explain.”

Parents can help by asking open-ended questions like, “Tell me what you learned today,” or “Why do you think that happened?” It’s okay if they answer in your home language—that thinking still counts. Teachers can help by modeling sentence starters like, “I think ___ because ___.”

Stay Connected

Clear, kind communication between home and school matters so much. If something is confusing, ask questions. Schools want families involved, even if language feels like a barrier. Translation tools and apps can help bridge gaps. Most importantly, remember this: learning a new language takes time. It’s not a race. With patience, encouragement, and teamwork, multilingual children don’t just “catch up.” They grow into confident, capable learners with a powerful skill that will serve them for life.

Strengths While Building Access

When we lead with patience, clear instruction, visual supports, and genuine connection, we create classrooms where language development and confidence grow together. With the right scaffolds and a belief in their potential, our multilingual learners don’t just adjust—they thrive.

Kids Need Interpersonal Skills at School

In my last post, I wrote about providing kids with opportunities to problem-solve and to engage in socializing without the use of technology. In this post, I want to continue to explore the idea of the differences between generations and what our children’s generation will need to develop the soft skills that are necessary for success in their futures.

One of my roles as a school principal is to oversee hiring for my school. Now job applications are collected online. Tools like Indeed and ZipRecruiter make it easy to apply to many jobs with just a few clicks of the mouse. One job posting typically brings in hundreds of applications. Earlier in my career, job postings would solicit only 15 to 20 applications. Most job applicants were qualified for the job. Today, many people look for jobs casually with a shotgun approach to submitting job applications. At times, when I reach out to applicants, there’s never a 100% guarantee they are even waiting for my call or my message.

When I do find those applicants who are qualified and responsive, I can usually tell fairly quickly whether or not they will be a good fit personality-wise. Things like confidence, general attitude, and true experience are revealed pretty quickly. However, it is important to ask probing interview questions that get to whether or not applicants have developed the soft-skills and interpersonal skills they will need to be successful in the workforce. In classrooms across our nation, teachers are sharing that kids are lacking these soft-skills with a much higher frequency as the school year progresses. Many kids are no longer self-motivated. They struggle when asked to work in groups. Often, students approach interactions with education staff and peers with a strong sense of entitlement.

Teaching Kids Essential Interpersonal Skills

Certainly, there are kids in the classroom who still possess these skills. They come to school ready to learn, ready to socialize, and ready to follow school expectations. But in a classroom of 30 students 20 years ago, you may have had one or two students who entered the classroom with a skills-deficit. Today, there are more likely 12-15 students who still need to develop one or more of those highly important abilities. Schools are doing some important interventions to help kids learn these skills on the fly, during content instruction:

Engaging kids in group work with structured roles
Project-based learning to help kids identify and solve problems
Service learning to make the content projects more community-based and relevant
Providing culturally relevant lessons and content to grab students’ interest and help make connections
Goal setting and monitoring with students to help foster a mind towards the future and self-motivation

How Parents Can Help

As the parent, you can take the lead on helping your child with the school’s staff develop these soft skills! During parent meetings and conferences, ask about what opportunities the kids have at the school to build social, emotional, and leadership skills. Examples include:

Partner with your child’s teacher(s) to address times when your child falls short. Advocate for your child, but make sure you work with other adults to help your child learn when they make mistakes.
Sign your child up for extracurricular activities that will require teamwork and interaction. These may include sports, martial arts, reading clubs, or youth service teams.
Make sure your time at home is well-balanced between opportunities to learn and interact and an appropriate amount of screen time.

Kids’ Learning with AI

I was born in 1981, which puts me just on the cusp of generations. I’m at the tail end of the Gen X generation by some timelines and right at the beginning of the Millennial generation on others. Some sociologists even label people born within a few years of my birthday as Xennials, a microgeneration to mark the small and transitional period during which I was born. Personally, I feel that the other Xennials and I got the best of both worlds. We experienced the care-free and independent lifestyle of the Gen Xers, but I got to live my teenage years as the world shifted into the fully digital age. This means I also have a blend of characteristics from the two generations: independent and adaptive. I am also adventurous, creative, tech-savvy, and plugged into the idea that the world is accessible to me, both in terms of information and in opportunity.

Is Techonology Hurting Our Kids?

My daughter was born in 2018, a time much different than the early years of the eighties. She is a member of Gen Alpha. Her life is fully immersed in technology and she is going to come of age in a time when she and her peers are at risk of losing many soft skills and interpersonal skills, including critical thinking and problem-solving. One of the challenges this generation faces is the sheer amount of information and technological capability available in her pocket. Some schools are fully tech-based. This is a characteristic that used to be touted as a unique feature at a school just a decade ago. Now, experts are questioning whether the amount of time students spend on technology is advantageous in the long run. Students are learning 21^st century skills, but are they losing something else that is hugely important to success in life? Are they losing their ability to identify, think through, and solve their own problems without the support of technology? The recent introduction of AI into education may further exacerbate this situation for our children.

Balancing Technology Use at Home

Per my previous posts, I am a proponent of technology in education. I have written about the benefits of AI in our lives, as well as in the lives of students. I still hold to those beliefs about technology. My goal today is to advocate for a better balance in our schools and in the lives of our children. Instead of having our kids go from using tech all day in school to staring at our screens in the living room at home, make sure your children have time at home to solve problems. Play board games that require problem solving and strategic thinking. Include your children in solving everyday problems at home. Also have your kids help you cook and figure out how to fix their own inevitable mistakes in the process. Technology is a wonderful tool. As with most things in our lives, we need to ensure our approach is one of moderation. Technology will continue to be one of our greatest tools and resources. It will also continue to present new social and ethical problems as it develops. As parents, let’s make sure our kids learn to use new tools while also providing opportunities for our kids to engage, socialize, and problem-solve using the tools that were naturally developed in the world of previous generations.

How to Parent Challenged Students

It is the dead of winter and students are locked up in classrooms with limited time to play outside due to unrelenting wind, cold, rain, or snow. Several students are recovering from viruses and flu. Many survive boredom by spending relentless hours playing computer games and visiting with their classmates online. Teachers are challenged with students suffering from cabin fever and mild winter depression.

Effective Classroom Strategies for Home Use

Here are 10 effective classroom management strategies that teachers use to calm students. These strategies are also effective for parents to use with their children at home.

Create a quiet space for children that is away from distractions and provides a nurturing environment. My classroom quiet space includes large soft huggable stuffed animals that children can lay on and read mediative books to self-regulate when overwhelmed with challenging situations.
Provide an assortment of fidget toys that may include squish and squeeze toys, rainbow relief sensory viewers, puzzle cubes, and fidget toys. These toys help students reduce their anxiety, relax, self-regulate, and concentrate.
Teach students slogans and cues to help them refocus and relax when learning difficult lessons.
Encourage students to breathe deeply and slowly exhale five times when feeling over-whelmed.
Integrate brain breaks throughout the day that may include dancing and singing with a video song, exercising, playing Simon Says with various movements, and participating in a daily run in favorable weather.
Have students participate in meditation and yoga activities before tests, after lunch time recess, and before large assembles.
Transition from one activity to another with fun brain breaks.
Reward students working extra hard with stickers and small incentive rewards.
Reward the class with points that are gained from focused learning and successful completion of assignments. A total of 50 points earned can be rewarded with special activities including pajama day, pizza party, popsicle treats, and technology day.
Reward the class on Fridays for a successful and productive week with 30 minutes of free play at the end of school day.

Emergency Survival Strategies

Some days are excessively difficult for struggling students. These 10 strategies can help teachers and parents reset a challenging day into a calmer day:

Have a staff member escort a student to a neutral area outside of the classroom for a time-out or for added time spent outdoors when weather permits.
Send the student to the nurse’s station or to the front office when the student is so overwhelmed with disturbing behaviors that may hurt themself or emotionally traumatize other students.
Conference with parents on a regular basis to ensure the parents of aware of their child’s challenged behaviors and work as a team to solve classroom misbehaviors.
Invite the student’s parent to volunteer in the classroom to help calm the student.
Partner with the parent to seek outside professional help for severely troubled students.
Model strategies that parents can use to help calm their child at home.
Encourage parents to practice regularly scheduled and relaxing bedtime preparation activities with their child that ensure sufficient sleep.
Encourage parents to prepare nutritional snacks and lunches that their child can easily eat at school.
Make sure the student drinks sufficient amounts of water daily and uses the bathroom regularly.
Enlist the assistance of the school nurse, counselor, and administrative staff when necessary.

When all else fails, the school staff will meet with parents to create a student success plan to monitor behaviors and ensure the student is receiving adequate support at home with partnership support at the school site.

Much success as you navigate the winter and spring quarters with your child in partnership with the classroom teacher.