Grandparenting an Athlete

It has been an exciting school year. The younger granddaughters are learning gymnastics as they advance in their ballet classes and performances. Our middle school grandson has completed a full season of cross country. Our passionate middle school granddaughter juggles a full schedule of select soccer and volleyball. And our older grandchild loves to sail and snow ski. Our greatest challenge is to be fully present for each grandchild as we watch them compete and follow their passions. Each has their individualized preferences for how we are present for their various activities. All request various levels of encouragement. Some love us to cheer loudly while others want us to observe quietly. The older grandkids accommodate our support while the younger grandkids want our full-time participation at all events. Thankfully, we are the grandparents. Our only job is to support each grandchild with their preferred level of support and drive them to an event when requested.

Organizing the Sports/Activity Calendar

At the beginning of the school year, I contact each grandchild and ask them how much they want us involved in the sport and activity schedule. The younger they are, the more they want our attention. Once they express their wishes, I organize our activity attendance schedule. The twins love to show me their recent new dance and gymnastics steps at home.  We are only required to drive them to class sometimes and are committed to attending formal performances twice a year. The middle school grandson’s schedule conflicted with the twins’ dance schedule. We volunteered to manage driving for the grandson’s Tuesday schedule while the parents and a babysitter shared driving for the twins’ schedule. I loved watching all cross country meets with our middle school grandson because he was passionate and excited about this new sport. We were encouraged to take photos at all events and share with our extended family. What a wonderful achievement! The older grandkids loved to have us attend many activities until middle school. Once in middle school we distanced ourselves as friends are very important and carpools are wonderful.

Cheering for a Grandchild Athlete

Next, we learned how to cheer for each child at their specific event. The ballet recitals were very disciplined so we quietly enjoyed the performances and awarded each twin with flowers after their performance when we all posed for family photos. The middle school cross country grandson loved having us cheer for him and his team. The coach encouraged outstanding teambuilding cheering for all athletes participating in the race. We took photos at each event and circulated them to family members. The older grandkids thanked us for coming and focused on their sport with their teammates. We were encouraged to cheer holistically for the team and remain calm and quiet.

 What I Have Learned from the Coaches

The following are guidelines I have learned from coaches after years of team participation as an athlete, parent, and now a grandparent:

1. Be present for the entire team.
2. Listen to the coach and follow the rules.
3. Reinforce the coach’s rules with your athlete.
4. Cheer for the entire group of participants.
5. Don’t coach your athlete or the team from the observation areas.
6. Be positive at all times.
7. Don’t distract with unnecessary chatter.
8. Bring snacks that nourish your athlete and the team.
9. Offer support or help when requested from the coach.
10. Model positive sportsmanship for all attendees at a sporting event.

When I consider the value of team sports, I am thankful that all our grandkids value their experiences in their selected sports and team activities. This participation overcomes isolation and encourages lifetime friendships. It helps our grandchildren learn how to effectively work with teams at home, school, and eventually in their jobs and careers.

Share your experiences as a parent or grandparent supporting your athletes in the comments section below this blog.

Nurturing Your Children’s Passions 

It’s a new year! Your children may become anxious about how to fill long dark winter days. What can you do as parents to nurture their passions? When your children tend to shut down on cold winter days, you may feel overwhelmed and frustrated on how your family will get through the winter months without going crazy.

Questions to Ask Your Kids to Identify Passions

Here are some questions you can ask your children to get them thinking about what they would like to do or explore during their free time:

1. What do you love most about school?
2. What would you like to do to keep your body moving on cold winter days?
3. What is your favorite playtime activity?
4. What do you like to do outside?
5. Who would you like to do a project with? What would you do for a project?
6. What would you like to learn about? How do you want to learn about this topic?
7. Where would you like to go to learn more about a specific topic?
8. Is there a museum or activity program that explores or provides training about a topic of interest?
9. What can I do to support your interests?
10. What should we research online to identify classes or learn more about your topic of interest?

Some of the Best Projects Come from Our Children

Children are capable of planning incredible projects when you encourage them with your actions. For example, Maria loves art and shares art projects with her friends. She creates temporary tattoos by drawing creations with marking pens on an absorbent sheet of paper. Then she places the marking pen art against her skin and dampens the sheet of paper with a paper towel. She is very impressed with transferred tattoos. Her sister, Anna, loves to create finger weaving leashes for her collection of stuffed animals. Rosie, her cousin, designs and sews doll clothes for her doll. She has also has created an Etsy account to sell customized Cricut stickers.

Science experiments generate lots of questions that must be answered. Brandon experimented with various hand sanitizers and surface cleaners to determine which products killed the most germs. Dave learned how to code and created various digital games.  Marla won an ecology award for learning how to continuously water trees while conserving water with various irrigation systems.

Passions Lead to Internships and Careers

Although these art projects and science experiments sound like educational and exciting rainy-day activities, several led to future internships and career choices. Maria now works in a store creating graphic art designs for tee shirts and other products. She plans to major in graphic art design when she starts college. Anna loves project-based learning and wants to inspire kids by becoming a project-based elementary teacher. Brandon has expanded his scientific interests and is currently becoming certified as a train engineer at a local park. Dave is getting ready to apply to colleges. He wants to eventually construct mass transit systems. I loved playing school when I was a kid and am still teaching students after 40 years in education.

Share in the comments section below this blog what passions you may have developed as a child that led to a satisfying career. Much success as you continue to support your children’s passions.

Acts of Kindness Monthly Calendar

Happy new year 2024! Each year many of us make new year’s resolutions and will fail fulfilling them within the first few weeks. This year I made the commitment to help our younger family members give back to their community. Planning should not overwhelm our family when considering their demanding schedules. To overcome this challenge, we convened family meetings with Brandon, Anna, and Maria.

Kindness Acts Calendar

We decided to focus on one act of kindness each month. Listed below is our proposed schedule of activities that might work for your family:

• January: It is cold outside and homeless shelters are filled with families. Donate a few hours at a soup kitchen or give a sack of groceries to our local food bank.
• February: Create 10 handmade valentines for a local senior center or senior nutritional lunch program. Give people who work hard in our community some chocolate candy.
• March: Distribute flowers to the neighbors to celebrate the start of spring.
• April: Make pretty Easter eggs with greetings and deliver to neighbors.
• May: Think of all the mothers we know and wish them a happy Mother’s Day.
• June: Make a lemonade stand and give away tee-shirts to cool off during the hot season.
• July: Clean up the streets from 4^th of July celebrations.
• August: On the first day of school, say good morning to everyone. Tell them that we hope they are happy with their teacher and friends in their class.
• September: Be kind to our parents and do things that our parents love to do with us on Labor Day.
• October: Try not to scare people with our costumes.
• November: Collect donations for the food bank to buy turkeys.
• December: Give new or nearly new toys to the Toys for Tots program.

Activity Reflection

After completing all of these acts of kindness, our family should feel fulfilled, tired, and happy! Much success by sharing your acts of kindness with others.

Parent Roles on School Committees 

It’s that time of year! Schools are desperately reaching out to parents to provide extended services that may include:

1. Volunteering in your child’s classroom or lunchtime supervision support
2. Fundraising for the school or a student group
3. Driving for field trips or sports activities
4. Acting as a leader for the Parent-Teacher-Student Association
5. Serving on a school or district advisory team for curriculum adoption, school plan development, special education services, English language learner services, Title I services, gifted or talented services, or local education bond oversight
6. Providing added after school or weekend services

Support Your Children’s Schools

Parents should seriously consider how they can best support each of their child’s school activities when considering their added job and family support needs. Many families struggle with accepting too many responsibilities at one school and not having any more time for the demands from another school. It is better to talk with each child to determine how they want their parents to support them. For example, could another family member offer more help? As grandparents, we provide carpool and homework help for the younger grandkids. Older grandkids may invite us to attend special sporting events as they prefer to carpool with their friends to most events.

Classroom parent volunteer help may include:

• Organizing and helping at special events
• Creating curricular units for a classroom teacher
• Listening to students read in small classroom groups
• Reading to children and managing an art or social studies activity that supports a story
• Helping students with their small group math assignments
• Sitting near challenged students to give encouragement and help them focus on assignments

School leadership activities that may incorporate parents’ special talents may include:

• Writing public relations stories for the school
• Organizing and leading fundraising activities
• Organizing and leading school events
• Organizing parent carpools for field trips or sporting activities
• Recruiting parents to serve on school leadership and advisory groups
• Helping with the after school childcare services

Consider Leadership Opportunities with Various Countries

When a parent has immigrated from another country or attended a different type of school, they can offer teachers a wider variety of culturally rich activities. Many parents are reluctant to become involved in their children’s classroom activities because they may have had limited experiences in the American school systems. Some parents from different countries help classroom teachers by sharing their cultural practices through cooking, art projects, storytelling, social studies projects, and plays. A few parents lead cultural history days. Several parents volunteer in classrooms during the Thanksgiving holiday season by talking about their holiday cultural practices. Others may lead students with various acts of kindness. They may host a fundraising event for cultural communities in need or adopt a school from another country with letter writing activities.

Grow Your Volunteer Leadership Talents

As parents become active in their children’s schools, many will gain leadership skills that can benefit their jobs. Others may explore new skills as they learn how to fundraise for a project or write a public relations story. Some may manage the social media platform for the school. The talents gained from these experiences may lead a parent to run for their local school board, substitute teach, work as a lunch time supervisor, or return to school to become a teacher. My own parent volunteer activities led me back to college many years ago to become a teacher and an educational leader. Please share your own leadership journey as a parent volunteer in the comments section under this blog.

New State, New School, New Challenges

When we decided to move from California to Illinois, my first panicked thought was, “What about school for the kids?!” I felt completely overwhelmed by the idea. How would I support them in a positive way and find educational solutions for each of them? My oldest son is extroverted, very involved in extracurricular activities, and will be a sophomore in high school. He loves his charter school here in California. I currently homeschool my other two daughters under the support of a charter school.  I had no clue about homeschooling laws in Illinois. My middle daughter also has an extensive IEP. How would her services transfer in a new state? I spent a few sleepless nights thinking about their unique needs. To be honest, it was less thinking and more like frantic worrying.

One Day at a Time

We are now only a few days away from our big move. At this point in our transition, we have a plan in place for the next school year and I feel more confident. Unfortunately, I don’t have a nicely packaged, “one size fits all” solution that will work for all families facing a cross-county move. I can only offer this:  take deep breaths and move forward every day, even if that means taking baby steps toward a solution. Nothing about my kids’ education for next year came together all at once. I tackled one question at a time, and eventually it all came together. Eventually, I started sleeping better at night.

 When to Move

First, we decided on a timeline. Since we had the luxury of choosing when we would move, we decided to wait until the end of the school year. This allowed my kids to be able to finish the year in a familiar place with their friends instead of trying to transition to something new in the middle of the year.

 Different New Schools for Different Needs

Once we answered the question of when we would move, I started working on what the new school year would look like. I researched public schools, private school options, and Illinois homeschool laws. I called school districts. I talked to superintendents, principals, and special education directors. My husband and son took a spring break road trip to our new state, so he could tour his new school. I talked to a few parents with kids in local schools to get their perspective and input. One step at a time, we made a plan that worked for our family.

And now, it’s time to pack the U-Haul. Deep breaths. Once box at a time.