Growth Mindset: The Power of Yet

When my daughter was a toddler, one of her favorite videos to watch on repeat was The Power of Yet.  This Sesame Street song was upbeat and fun for her to dance to, but the message was great as well.  The singer was shown with a variety of muppets as they tried or practiced new skills; the message was that things may be difficult at first, but that just means we have not mastered them YET!  This is the idea behind having a a growth mindset, a very important skill or approach to life that we must teach our kids.  Without this mindset, they are likely to grow into teens and kids who cannot handle difficult situations or failure.

How to Help Our Kids Learn New Skills

Developing new skills takes time and kids need support to manage their emotions while they tackle new activities.  As parents, we want to be sure our kids can be successful, but we have to be aware that too much intervention will keep our kids from developing appropriately.  If our babies get frustrated with learning to use a spoon and we feed them to avoid the crying, we are robbing them of the time to learn that fine motor skill.  When they are learning to tie their shoes, they will get frustrated at those darn bunny ears, but if we don’t encourage them to keep trying, they will be 30 years old and still wearing Crocs and velcro shoes.  While these situations may seem silly, these are the early times when we are teaching a growth mindset.  As kids get older, the situations get more serious: learning to advocate for themselves, learning to solve problems on their own, learning to speak out against unethical or immoral acts.  As kids grow, we have to allow them to struggle as they learn new skills so they learn that failure leads to learning and success, not that failure leads to someone stepping in to do it for them.

Teaching Our Kids Critical Thinking Skills and Grit

So what can you do to help your child develop that growth mindset?  Here are some very tangible suggestions for how to push your child to develop the skills, critical thinking, and grit needed when things get tough:

1. Talk to your child openly about this concept.  When they ask for help, remind them that we learn by trying and practicing, not when others do things for us.  We need to explain that we will help by giving advice and through encouragement, but many things they will need to learn and do on their own.
2. Remind them of the Power of Yet!  We won’t be great at everything the first time we try it, but the more we try and the more we practice, the better we will get.  When they say they can’t do something, remind them that they just can’t do it YET, but that they will get better and better over time.
3. When they are a bit older, include them in household problem-solving.  When you need to create a grocery list, do a simple repair, or work out a budget, include them in the conversation.  This will model that everyone has challenges and that they can work with you to solve problems as they arise.
4. Model learning a new skill!  Whether you want to learn to play the guitar, invest, cook, or do some artistic landscaping, it’s good for your kids to see you struggling with new skills as well!  You can talk about your wins and frustrations as part of the learning process and model a growth mindset for them.
5. Work with your child to set goals.  Having goals and working towards them fosters motivation and engagement.  These can be goals for home or school, but having goals helps push us forward.

Model Growth Mindset

Parenting isn’t easy, and none of us wants to see our kids struggle.  But remember that it’s your job to help them learn how to problem solve and to learn new skills, not to solve problems or do things for them!  Teach and model that growth mindset and take advantage of those teachable moments.

Get Support for Your Child at School

Many schools these days share that they are a “PBIS school” or that they “Use the MTSS framework” for student support.  The use of these acronyms may leave some parents feeling lost or unsure about the programs that are in place for their children at school.  It’s important to know and understand the systems your child’s school uses so you can be informed when you are asking for support.

MTSS, a commonly used system for addressing student behavior and needs, stands for Multi-Tiered Systems of Support.  In this framework, efforts to support students are divided into three categories: Tier 1 (universal supports), Tier 2 (group supports), and Tier 3 (targeted interventions).  A breakdown of these tiers is provided below:

Tier 1: Universal Supports

These are supports and expectations that are in place for all students.  One of the basic elements of this tier is having a set of clear expectations for all students that are taught and enforced in all areas of the school.  Many schools use a set of expectations like, “Be safe, be responsible, and be respectful.”  These are recommended expectations because they are easy to understand and most student work and/or behaviors would fall into these three categories if they need to be addressed.  Schools also have explanations and examples of what meeting these expectations would look like in all areas of the school, including classrooms, walkways, and the cafeteria.  Tier 1 supports may also include a school token economy or rewards system, and there may be a set of both positive and negative consequences for meeting (or not meeting) these expectations.   Approximately 80-85% of students will be successful with just tier 1 level supports and interventions.

Tier 2: Group Support and Interventions

These supports will be necessary for 10-15% of the school population.  For these students, they have a specific need that is not addressed by tier 1 supports, but it is still a need that at least a small group of students may have.  For example, there may be a group of students who are bullying others or a group of students who are frequently absent from school.  These students may be referred for group therapy, additional check-ins with a staff member, or they may be referred for after-school tutoring or a club.

Tier 3: Targeted Interventions and Supports

Tier 3 supports should only be necessary for approximately 5% of the population.  These students need more targeted services and supports than most general education students, and school-based teams can work with families to determine which interventions are needed.  For example, a student may have extreme anxiety, may be far behind academically, or they may have a need for individual counseling or therapy.  Whatever the need, tier 3 interventions are typically unique and targeted to the specific needs of individual students.  To be clear, not every need will require tier 3 supports; these interventions are reserved for more serious and urgent student needs.

If you believe your child needs support, make sure you go to the school and advocate for your child.  Schools have systems, partnerships, and staff in place to bring these needs to the right people at the school so your child can get the support they need.  Using this information about typical supports at a school will help you have a great conversation with the staff at the school to help find the right support for you and your family.

Teaching Our Kids Character Habits That Last a Lifetime (Part 3)

Our childen excel when we help them learn character habits at home and school. My first two blog posts discussed effective perserverance, leadership, empathy, bravery, and ethical skill development. Below are strategies parents and teachers can use to help childen learn how to become accountable, respectful, provide service to their families and communities.

Accountability: Own Your Choices

Accountability means taking responsibility for your words and actions. Kids who practice this habit learn that mistakes are okay—when we own them and grow from them.

Encourage accountability by:

• Letting natural consequences happen when appropriate
• Helping your child reflect on poor choices without shame
• Using phrases like “What do you need to do to make it right?”

Try this: After a challenging moment, ask, “What would you do differently next time?”

Books to share:

David Gets in Trouble by David Shannon: David learns to take responsibility for his actions. Short and humorous but opens the door for honest conversations.

The Paperboy by Dav Pilkey: A quiet, reflective story about a boy who honors his daily responsibility. Subtle but powerful.

Respect: Treat Others How You Want to Be Treated

Respect is foundational. It means valuing yourself, others, and your environment. It starts with kindness and expands to how we speak, listen, and act.

Build respect by:

• Setting clear expectations around language and behavior
• Demonstrating respect in your own relationships (even when you disagree!)
• Talking about the importance of caring for things—home, school, nature

Try this: Ask, “What’s one way you showed respect today?”

Book to share:

All Are Welcome by Alexandra Penfold: A beautifully illustrated book that celebrates diversity, inclusion, and respect in a school community.

Stand Tall, Molly Lou Melon by Patty Lovell: Molly Lou respects herself despite being different—and earns others’ respect by staying true to who she is.

Service: Help Others from the Heart

Service is about giving—not to get something back, but to make the world better. Children who serve become more aware of their role in a community and how they can contribute.

Foster service by:

• Volunteering as a family, even in small ways (like helping a neighbor)
• Encouraging random acts of kindness
• Celebrating efforts that come from the heart, not for a reward

Try this: Create a “kindness jar” and fill it with acts of service your child notices or does each week.

Books to share:

The Lion and the Little Red Bird by Elisa Kleven: A sweet story about kindness and care through quiet actions and gentle observation.

Last Stop on Market Street by Matt de la Peña: CJ and his grandmother ride the bus through the city, serving others and finding beauty and purpose in unexpected places. A modern classic about service and community.

Growing Good Humans

The habits of character give children a roadmap—not just to succeed, but to lead, care, and thrive. This framework helps families make these habits come to life, day after day.

You don’t have to be perfect to raise children of character. You just need to be intentional. Every bedtime talk, every moment of reflection, and every story you share builds something lasting.

Because in the end, we’re not just helping our kids become good students. We’re helping them become good people.

Teaching our Kids Character Habits That Last a Lifetime (Part 2)

When we help our kids learn character habits at school and at home, they excel more at school and home. My first blog post discussed how to help kids develop effective peserverance and leadership skills. Summarized below are strategies parents can use to help their children develop the character habits of empathy, bravery, and ethical behavior.

Empathy: See, Listen, and Feel with the Heart

Empathy teaches children to step outside themselves, understand others’ perspectives, and value diversity. It’s a cornerstone of healthy relationships and inclusive communities.

Build empathy by:

• Talking about feelings and naming emotions
• Asking reflective questions after social situations: “How do you think they felt?”
• Reading diverse books that show different cultures, experiences, and points of view

Try this: Play “perspective switch”—have your child imagine what someone else might be thinking or feeling in a situation.

Books to share:

I Walk with Vanessa by Kerascoët: A wordless book that shows a small act of empathy turning into a movement of kindness. Invites deep discussion across all ages.

Lubna and Pebble by Wendy Meddour: A touching story about a young refugee who finds comfort in a pebble and then chooses to comfort another. Beautiful for discussing empathy, courage, and friendship.

Bravery: Do Hard Things

Bravery isn’t just for superheroes. It’s for kids who try new things, speak up for what’s right, and believe in themselves.

Nurture bravery at home by:

• Encouraging your child to take healthy risks (like joining a new group or speaking in front of others)
• Supporting them when they make mistakes or feel nervous
• Helping them advocate for themselves at school or in friendships

Try this: Ask, “What’s something brave you did today?”

Books to share:

Jabari Jumps by Gaia Cornwall: Jabari wants to jump off the diving board but has to face his fear first. A relatable and uplifting story of trying hard things.

Brave Irene by William Steig: Irene shows physical and emotional bravery as she battles a snowstorm to deliver a dress for her sick mother. A classic story of courage.

Ethical: Do the Right Thing

Ethical behavior means doing the right thing—even when no one’s watching. It’s about having integrity, especially when it’s hard.

Teach ethics by:

• Modeling honesty and fairness in your own choices
• Discussing real-life situations and asking, “What’s the right thing to do?”
• Praising honesty—even when it comes with a tough consequence

Try this: Ask, “What do you do when no one is watching?” and celebrate those quiet wins.

Books to share:

Do Unto Otters: A Book About Manners by Laurie Keller: A humorous and engaging story about treating others the way you want to be treated. Fun, yet rooted in the golden rule.

A Bike Like Sergio’s by Maribeth Boelts: A boy finds money and wrestles with doing the right thing. Excellent for discussing honesty, temptation, and ethics.

My next blog post will discuss how parents can reinforce the character habits of accountability, respect, and service at school and in daily life activities that can last a lifetime.

Teaching Our Kids Character Habits That Last a Lifetime (Part 1)

Academic success is important but so is raising children who are kind, courageous, and compassionate. That’s why many schools, including those inspired by EL Education, go beyond traditional academics to teach Habits of Character—the values and behaviors that help students become the best version of themselves.

While EL Education highlights four core character traits—Respect, Responsibility, Perseverance, and Compassion—many schools (like mine) build on this foundation to include other important habits such as Leadership, Empathy, Bravery, Ethical Behavior, Accountability, and Service. Together, these form a framework for developing responsible and resilient children.

The best part, you don’t need a classroom to teach these habits. Parents can nurture them at home, in the car, during family meals, and on the playground. Let’s take a closer look at each habit and how you can help your child grow in character every day.

Perseverance: Try and Try Again

In EL classrooms, perseverance means embracing challenges, using positive self-talk, and trying new strategies until success is found. At home, you can help build this habit by:

• Encouraging your child to tackle difficult tasks instead of avoiding them
• Modeling persistence when things get tough (even with adult frustrations!)
• Celebrating effort, not just outcomes: “I’m proud of how you kept going!”

Try this: When your child wants to give up, ask, “What’s one more thing you could try?” or “Who could you ask for help?”

Books to share:

The Most Magnificent Thing by Ashley Spires: A funny and heartwarming story about a girl who struggles, fails, and tries again to create her “magnificent thing.” It’s a perfect example of grit and positive self-talk.

Rosie Revere, Engineer by Andrea Beaty: Rosie learns that failure is just a part of the process on the path to creativity and success. Encourages perseverance and curiosity.

Leadership: Inspire and Empower

Leadership isn’t about being in charge—it’s about inspiring excellence in others. Children can learn to lead by developing trust, thinking creatively, and modeling positive behaviors.

Help build leadership at home by:

• Giving your child age-appropriate responsibilities
• Encouraging them to speak up for themselves and others
• Praising moments when they encourage siblings or friends

Try this: Ask, “What’s one way you helped someone feel confident today?”

Books to share:

What Do You Do With an Idea? by Kobi Yamada: A poetic story about nurturing ideas and having the courage to lead change, even when others don’t understand.

Swimmy by Leo Lionni: Swimmy helps a group of small fish work together to solve a problem. A simple but powerful example of leading through unity and creativity.

My next blog post will share how you can embrace the character habits of empathy, bravery, and ethical behaviors with your child at school and in daily life.